My head aches beyond all reasonable imagination. Just the fucking sound of my fingers pressing the keys gives me little twinges of pain in my temples. I'm only typing this up out of guilt, because I haven't written anything in a couple of days. I don't like for an entry to be lingering at the top for to long... I get bored of it easily.
I'm in the mood to write something. Anything except what I'm supposed to be writing, though. I don't know, I want to do a short story, or a short film, a fan fiction-- something. I'm still in such a god damn rut creatively... I haven't liked a single thing I've written in months.
I'm reading this over as I type, thinking 'What the fuck is this shit coming out of my fingers?'
I guess that's what happens when you're surrounded by people who are ten times better and more dedicated than you'll ever be for the better part of the week. Kind of makes you realize: 'Holy shit, I can't fucking do this.'
I think I really fucked up.
and the uglier
5 comments:
Sorry youre in a rut. Call me when you get this. I don't care what time it is. Thomas and everyone are meeting tomorrow for lunch.
you have talent brian. more then any thousand people around here. but that what happens when you go to school like that, you compare yourself to everyone else around you. but you shouldnt. just do your thing.
Listen to Lyssa.
Welcome to the life. I don't mean to do the whole 'kick while down' routine, but get over it a little, man. As you've so often told me, this (the creative ruts) just happens. We've all been there; you can't avoid it. It'll pass.
And for the record, sir, you have a great deal of talent, but that doesn't mean everything you do will show that. Some stuff sticks, some doesn't. That's the way it goes.
Keep on keepin' on.
Bit late commenting on this... but what the hell. Dude, you've got talent man. Yours was pretty much the only funny sketch on the sketch show, for one thing. And for another, I know for a fact that almost everyone in class is either just as insecure, if not MORE insecure, than you are about their skills. Honestly, man, you're better than a LOT of our classmates.
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